Articles by: sumchok
haha….ha…..Yesterday evening i had a small gathering with my friends at my place .My friends arrived with their hubby and kids, and so the merriment began .We started with a bottle of wine. And when it was dinner time we had gulped down full five bottles! I had my last cup full and went for the toilet, then returned and found out my cup empty. And lol! There beside my chair my friend karma had her cup empty before her and my cup of wine in her hands. I tried to leave it but Dechen instantly sensed the situation and shouted “wai, wrong cup!” Everyone had a hearty laugh. And thus, we bagan with a new bottle………..
It's the hard universal truth ever since this humanity evolved,the relationship of a mother inlaw and a daughter inlaw have had wars,so perceived and it's true that there are good mother inlaws amongst the bad ones.But every time when a relationship's at a stake,it's always a mother inlaw or either a daughter inlaw who gets blamed,and situations complicated.
I have my mother inlaw and i call her 'Abi”.We are poles apart,might be because of the generation gap.She's seventy nine but as strong and young as a fifty old woman.When i get home after office i see my three year old with her teeth stained,happily chewing doma with abi.I resent that but abi says doma helps keep teeth strong.Dinner time,and my older one sits with abi and relishes the hot red chilli powder,i try to abstain her from having the chilli but abi advises me to let children take chilli for better appetite,the next day my kid gets diarrohea.And i have my house maid who irritates me to a horizon and abi's her loyal supporter.It's breakfast time and my maid brings potato curry which to my dismay is uncooked and on my frustration,abi takes a bite of the uncooked potato and says,”though uncooked,the curry's delicious!!”My healthy flowers started rotting away with abi's constantly watering them.I ask abi not to water the plants frequently but she believes plants grow faster if watered daily,and by the end of two weeks most of my flowers perished.And the list of differences goes on.Sometimes she really gets on my nerves and i keep myself shut in my room.
But when i get out i see my kids happily laughing over abi's story and my little one teeeth stained smiling at me.And i realize what my kids might loose when abi's gone.I pray god to let abi live for many many more years for my kids,for us.We,abi and i might not be a good team but we share a very unique relationship based on mutual respect for eachother.When a day ends,abi and i make sure we sit together and sip on small glasses of wine and hear out her old lifetime memories.And that's a real Bliss!
Last Saturday my little one, who's three was stung by a bee. She came to me crying and said, “mummy, a big fly in a wolly coat has just bitten me!”
An english teacher asked her class for sentences using the word 'beans'.
“My father grows beans”' wrote one student.
“My mother cooked beans”, wrote another.
Then little Karma stood up and read his sentence,”We are all human beans!”
I am here today,4th March,2001,JDWNRH,bed no.6,staring at the empty ceiling,counting the lights,thinking of so many thoughts,sympathizing on so many sick babies and slightly praying to the unknown god and of course deeply cursing the ill fates of so many sick,bed ridden kids at so tender ages.
I wonder if god grants lives,why does he add suffering there?Does every human has to pay the price for being born a human???If so,I wish no human to be born,they are swept off their lives,without their choice,without consent.Life should be something beautiful,merry,why full of sufferings.If life is a bowl of sufferings,especially for the tender hearts,there's no point of regarding it a living, but i would rather call it “a dying flame in a storm…..'
Why the small kids,tender livings?My heart aches for so many fragile babies suffering before my eyes.I only take solace upon the liberty I have left that I can at least pray for their safe recovery.I cry over their sufferings yet my conscience stabs me for I am no match to their fates!But every moment I keep praying for these wailing kids near me,life's so unfair sometimes.
It was written a decade ago(in my diary),when my niece was hospitalized with pneumonia,she was only two.A three year old lost her life before my very own eyes that evening and I felt devastated to see the mother cry over her lifeless child,it pierced my heart. It has remained one of the most unforgettable days in my life.
I am holding onto my own hand,
Because people don't just understand.
I was always my own best friend,
I never borrow,I never lend.
Walking casually down life's street,
Seeing things I need to see,
Holding onto empty hands,
Who needed help but never asked.
All those people just like me,
Who were always there yet never seen!
Living a lie,thriving in unreality,
I've never believed, in unanimity.
I was not always like I am today,
Familiar with ends I never began.
Choked by life's bitter truths,
I live by my own rules,
Claiming the status of Stand Alone,
I continue to live, I never groan!
Though frivolous life to me may seem,
In real life;I still do believe…..
I always believed love's forever young,,love happens once and lasts for an eternity………I am happily married and i have a good life.My hubby's a wonderful man,we fell in love one spring.Love was in the air,Love cards exchanged and our love took us to a wed-lock.Eight years have gone by and we still cherish the old days,memories down the lane….
All these years my heart remained faithful to my hubby.We share something that life means being with him.Even imagining life with someone other felt like a sin.Life's still sweet but has turned sour too.I met someone else who touched my heart for the second time in love.I know it's wrong on my side but everything feels right when i see him. I feel the butterfly flutter in my stomach when i see him,and life feels complete when i am in his arms.I feel the glow on my cheeks ,I feel the guilt and it pricks my heart but i guess i've fallen in love again,beautifully…..
Is it normal then to love two men at the same time??????It's certainly not right but i can't really help it.My troubled heart asks me to choose one life but i cannot make a choice.I canno't lose anyone of them.My heart's selfish,selfish……………What can i do????The melancholy in my heart's killing me,might be i willl find solace when i close my eyes forever,never to open them again.I beleive that will be a perfect punishment for daring to love another man out of my marriage.But i still dare to ask,Can we rule over a heart????
***Selden was that beautiful woman who dared to love two men in her life.But since fate's predestined,She cuoldn't hold the melancholy of her troubled heart.On 5th of October,2006,she hanged herself and took her life.And,thus ended her finel woes.
I have no doubts! My hubby was on tour and i went to bed with my two little girls.With my usual activity of tellihg them of a bed time story,i put them to sleep.I don't remember when i actually fell asleep but i was in a sound sleep.there were no dreams,only peaceful slumber.I was still in my sleep when i felt something,i wonder what!!But i woke up instantly opening my eyes wide open……
I still cannot fathom what it was but as soon as i opened my eyes i saw a figure,just standing near my bedroom door,i could feel it staring intently at us but i couldn't see it's face,only a plain figure stood there! It wasn't a dream,nor a nightmare.Was it real??Yes,it was.
And forgetting everything i screamed……My hairs stood on an end.Then i held my frightened kids who looked scared and pale.I managed to compose my state,reassuring them that it was only my bad dream.My babysitter came running,still in a sleep but much concerned.She put her bed beside ours and went to sleep.I hushed and put my kids back to sleep.
It was 1:30 am then,but sleep was out of question.I lay on my bed in trepidation and just kept praying.It was morning when sleep finally crept into my tired and bewildered eyes…
When i think of that night,i can still feel the chill….many might not beleive it but i know it was real.It sounds very fictitious but the veracity of my experience remains with me.
M-My very own
O-Once and for all
M-Master of my existence
M-Masterpiece of my life
I wish god would hear my second pleas to restore my mom's life for me,diamonds and platinums are of little value in my life now,i only wish to see my mom and hear her call out my name every morning and evening.Is it possible??Make it possible god,please i beg of you! Frens, please pray for my mom,i believe every little thoughts and prayers counts.Thank you.
My home was crowded with the guests.One morning i suffered severe stomach cramps and i ran to the toilet only to find my hubby in. I ran to the common toilet but to my dismay my guests were already lined up. So,i went to my toilet and shouted at my hubby to open the door, it took several minutes but still he wasn't getting out. Angrily i banged on the toilet door continuously, shouting and calling him names…….. Finally the door opened and out stepped my hubby's brother in-law, looking certainly ashamed and flushed out! Ha….ha….ha….My hubby had long ago got out and was in the kitchen.
Everyone of us,siblings gathered,and for us it was like a sort of family re-union,some of us hadn't met for more than seven years. But i despised us for having met for something so grave. We took turns to sit by our mom and i could read the same thoughts in everyone of us.The only prayers we had was to see our mom open her eyes,if even for a while.Telepathy was our only hope and we kept trying on that,calling out and talking to our mom.
Minutes,hours and days went by but the situation remained the same,but on the sixth day my mom flickered her left foot.It was a momentum in our lives,doctors poured in and everything went busy.Our tiny hopes took a higher diverge and we were encouraged to keep on talking to her.Somewhere we knew she could hear us and she herself longed to see her children around her.My mom was still unconsicious but she gradually started moving her feet and hands quite often.And when she did that,i could see the flicker of joys and hopes in my dear dad's eyes.Every morning i prayed god to take everything from me and present my mom back,healthy and hearty!
On the eleventh day it was as if god heard my pleas,my mom opened her eyes,but she was too weak to recognize us.But it was a day,i'll never forget,i should never forget to thank god for his miracle.I do beleive now that miracles do happen! even doctors rejoiced. Later ultrasounds confirmed that my mom had fullblown jaundice,gallstone on top of her kidney failure.But with hope still intact.i am thankful to the doctors that my mom was atleast out of coma.My mom's still in the hospital recuperating,feeble but worthily alive.
For as long as life's granted i forever wish to see my mom,hear her call out my name,sigh over her in-defence of my kids,and hear her voice over the cell………….most importantly get a responce whenver i call out mom.As i journeyed back to join my regular duty after weeks,i cried through the journey unleashing all the pent up emotions.It was so hard to leave my mom,it felt like abandoning her but i had to.Life offers limited choices sometimes.
May god hold my mom on the palms of his hands and take care of her forever for me,for my family.
It was a recent one Saturday that my mom called me. It was as usual a warm pleasure to hear her voice. Monday came and i was informed my mom was taken to the emergency ward ,JDWNRH. I felt my limbs go weak and i could only cry. I prayed for her. Yet Tuesday came and my dear mom was put up in the ICU then.
Thousands of thoughts pierced my heart and my heart yearned for thousands of miracles.How i wish i had a pair of magic wings,so that i could fly to my ailing mom in a blink of an eye.But the reality remained and i sat on my bed crying helplessly.Tears were my only solace then…….
We learnt that my mom had fallen into a temporary coma.The next day i left for Thimphu.Finally when i got to see her in the ICU i couldn't take the sight.My mom was breathing on the life support,lying lifeless on the bed,all her vital parts linked to infinite pipes and machines.I thought,”Is it the end?” “No”,i shouted,it couldn't be.I clasped and felt her palms,hands,her tiny feet…..I called her several times,Mom….mom….mom…..hoping,wishing gravely to hear her response,hear the voice i so much longed,but my words reverberated back to me.
For an instance i questioned god,”Is it a punishment for me?”Again i thought might be it was a test of faith and patience.
To be continued……………
A primary school teacher,it is said got this essay from one of her students.
The bird i am going to write about is the owl.The owl cannot see all by day and at night it is as blind as a bat.I donot know much about the owl,so i will write about a beast,which i have chosen to write about.
It is the cow.The cow is a mammal.It has six sides;right.left,upper and below.At the back it has a tail on which hangs a brush.With this it sends the flies away so they don't fall in the milk.The head is for the horns to grow.The horns are to blow with and the mouth is to moo.Under the cow hangs the milk,it is arranged for milking.When people milk the milk comes and it never finishes.How the cow does this our teacher didn't teach us.The cow has very good smell sense,it can be smelled from very far away.This is the reason why there is fresh air in our country. The man cow is called an ox and ox is not a mammal.The cow does not eat much but what it eats cow eats two times so it will not stay hungry.When a cow is hungry it moos loudly so we can hear.When it is quiet it is because the cow's stomach is all filled up with grass.The cow sleeps all night so it never sees the owl bird.I have never seen one but i have seen a cow many many many times.
Cherish things while you still have them,
Before they are gone and you realize,
How precious they really are.
Life can be understood backwards,
But it must be lived forwards.
Everything in life is temporary'
If things are going well,
Enjoy it because it won't last forever,
And if things are going badly,
Don't worry that won't last forever either.
Destiny is not a matter of chance,
It is a matter of choice,
It is not a thing to be waited for,
It is a thing to be achieved,
Cherish today,you'll never get it back.
It was there,unaware,the mark of a vampire on my neck,we often call it 'love-bite'!In the morning my daughter looked at me intently and exclaimed,”mommy,what's that on your neck?” I jumped out of the bed,imagining about something creepy on me.But it was a relief knowing that nothing sort of creepy crawled on me.
I stood in front of the mirror and behold,i saw the mark,clear,blueish red and heard her question again,”what's that mommy?”I smiled and just for fun i told her that it was a ghost-bite and the ghost was none other than her apa(dad). Ha….Ha…she looked suspiciously at her sleeping dad and ran out not wishing to miss her favourite episodes of Chota Bheem.
Saturday,the next day we all went to see my in-laws at Deothang.It was a good time,family get-together.The mark,i love to call it love-bite though was out of my mind then.The heat was on,and i got in a sleeveless white half shirt.My hubby's elder sister noticed the mark on my neck and i became alert.But before i could mend the situation she cassualy pointed her sleek finger and asked about the mark.
I felt my tongue tied and blushed,and before i could answer my daughter came to my rescue and shouted before everyone, “Ening ngarey doen thur gi mommy ngama la na,doen so apa gewa chowa dang na”(mommy was bitten by a ghost last night,do u know who was the ghost,it was my apa………)
I saw my hubby's eyes pop out and fixed upon mine,accusing me.I felt my cheeks going red and the heat of embarrassment almost melted me.Then i heard everyone laugh out loud,i excused myself and ran to the toilet.Well, I learnt the important lesson,to be careful about what i speak out in front of my kids.
But let me confess truthfully that i loved the ghost-bite,the sign of my hubby's love!
A woman who played cards was concerned that she always woke her husband when she came home at night.One night she tried not to awake her husband, she undressed in the living room, put her purse over arm, tiptoed nude into the bedroom only to find her husband sitting up in the bed reading.
Then shocked he exclaimed,”Now what?Did you lose everything?!!!!”
I thought this spicy recipe was a surefire way to please everyone at the table.Guests arrived and i got busy entertaining them and with a tooth paste smile i sat chatting with my guests.
Chilli chicken,i remembered was on the stove.It was almost ready and tomato chopped was all it needed to give the final touch of seasoning and colour. I called my maid and asked her to add a tomato in the chilli chicken.Time went by and dinner was ready.I put out the self-serve bowls.It was all so perfect.My guests began and one of them lifted the lid from the chilli chicken bowl.And LOL!!! What did we see?!
There,between, on top of my chilli chicken lay a full,round red tomato, like a cherry on an ice-cream! I realised my folly,i forgot to direct my Suppandi maid to chop the tomato into pieces to blend them with the chicken.She had just put a whole tomato on top.
My hubby and my guests looked at me suspiciously.With a brave tooth paste smile again,with a fork i spanked on the tomato and toasted it out to my guests.I still wonder about what my guests might have thought of the tomato cherry!!!And my Suppandi maid's still the same,here with me.
Having been invited to a party,i stood before my wardrobe, not sure what to wear.My little one,who's six asked me what was the matter.I told her i was confused over what to change into.She instantly replied,” a butterfly” !
It almost took more than twenty years for me to get this point,it was because i grew up very much with this idea that there was always something i was supposed to do,and if i wasn't doing it, God would be angry with me,dissapointed with my existence.
When i really understood that my primary duty was to feel and experience joys,happiness,the sweetness of this life,the one time gift of God,then i began to work upon things which brought me joys.I began to immerse into the immense gifts of this life;joys,love,freedom,laughters……..
So, what does happiness mean to me?I find my happiness in;
-when my little one hugs me tight in the morning with her eyes still closed
-stepping through my own front door
-soaking in a long,hot bath
-getting little parcels perfectly wrapped
-a walk in the rain
-standing barefeet on freshly mown grass
-sepia photographs of the bygone days
-watching the fluffy clouds scudding across azure sky
-weekend at the thermal spa
-light streaming through the glass window in the morning
-putting up my feet with a glossy magazine
-dressing up my two girls
-dining at a cosy eatery at town
-having a secret to keep and hold dear
-brightness of my flowers bloom
-finding my old friends in the FB
-listening to my favourite pieces of music
-an ice-cream treat with my kids
-a rainbow after a storm
-having a good spruce up
-the happy feeling when my hubby returns after a tour
-a designer outfit
-a warm hug
-a glass of wine at the end of the day
-a room piled up floor to the ceiling with books
-and ofcourse,money in the bank!
I believe creating our own happiness,we create our well-being.Each one of us is special,worth of all the joys and good things in this life and i wish everyone to be happy always.Happiness is our birthright,we have the right to happiness.So don't miss it! Cherish this life,remember each day is a bonus.
Nicholas Sparks has never failed to fascinate me, but always leaves me melancholy at heart with his tragic endings! 'Message in a bottle' touched my heart and when i ended reading the book it left me crying on my bed emotionally. My hubby caught the act and mocked me and we laughed together later.
Three days later my hubby left for a long tour.It's been almost two weeks now but he calls us faithfully every evening. Nothing feels right without him,kids miss him dearly and yes,i do too. But life's like that, small separation binds us to a more loving bond. The evenings kids get busy with their favourite episodes of Chota Bheem and i dwell in my own world,mostly reading. Last Wednesday the lights went out and everything came to a standstill.I remembered putting a wine bottle in the refrigerator,it was perfectly chilled for the hot evening.I took it out,got a glass and put them on the table.As i proceeded to open the wine bottle,my eyes caught a paper pasted neatly on the bottle. Getting the candle near,i went over the lines on the paper,it was a note left by my hubby.It was inscribed,”Take good care of the kids.Will miss u all very much,see you all soon.Enjoy the wine but don't cry okai.Love you always”.
The note gave me smiles but i couldn't help crying…….It was a touching moment in my life with 'A message on a bottle'. I did pour the sweet wine and made my evening.When my hubby called I thanked him for the part of Nicholas Sparks in him,
'MESSAGE ON A BOTTLE'